‘Come quickly, I’m tasting stars.’
In neuro-linguistics, persuasive writing is yours for the doing. By incorporating visual, auditory, feeling and some gustatory words into your copy, you can involve all your readers, just as easily as you can when speaking — more easily, perhaps, because you are able to rewrite words for a printed page, whereas it is difficult to take back the spoken word.
‘Honest criticism is hard to take, particularly from a relative, a friend, an acquaintance or a stranger.’
As a useful beginning to using these three or four languages, go to your files and pull out letters, reports, brochures, flyers and even invitations that have been sent out in the past few months. Rewrite them, slipping in the three or four languages that you have learned from the past few pages. See if the copy now leaps off the page.
Deliberately seek out the companionship of someone whom you have never really liked, although you do not know why. Have coffee with them, talk to them and listen for their personal communication style. See if it is different from yours.
Remember this little rhyme:
I do not like thee, Dr Fell, The reason why I cannot tell,
But this I know and know full well,
I do not like thee, Dr Fell.
Now we know why: it’s all in the way we and other people speak, hear and write.
When you see life as a process in which there are winners and losers, you can become a winner by understanding and meeting;, the unconscious needs of others. For instance:
- Know the outcome when you go into a meeting. Be very clearabout what it is you want to achieve in this time. I mentally lockthe door with my outcome as I enter a meeting and know that I cannot get out until I have achieved it or have come to a joint agreement on a variation.
- Court the other person. Look, listen, feel and probe. Use the phrase ‘What is it?’ and then repeat back his or her concerns about price, timing, delivery, colour, design — whatever. This will give you the sensitivity to know whether you are moving towards or away from your desired outcome. Acknowledge the reason to yourself.
- Be flexible. Vary your approach according to the other person’s needs. Nobody on earth sees, hears or feels exactly the way you do. We can never know the full facts behind another ’s wants, needs and desires. We can, however, probe and listen for sufficient clues to adapt.
You did it naturally when you were a child. You do it when you are in pursuit of an object of desire. You can do it in business.
Success in any interaction
- Put yourself into top condition. This means being physically and mentally alert, in tune with the other person’s needs and your own.
- Have a purpose, aim, direction or outcome for the interaction. I:1 Establish rapport (more on which follows).
- Have a plan on how to proceed next.
Rapport is the ability to reduce to a minimum the unconscious difference between you and someone else. People don’t have to like you to be in rapport with you. What is important is that they feel comfortable with you on an unconscious level which, in the end, probably means that they do like you.
Two aspects of rapport: pacing and leading
Pacing comes from matching certain aspects of others’ behaviour so that they begin to feel comfortable with you. Once this happens the next step is to lead them in the direction you want them to move. The secret of, and reason behind, seeking rapport is that we all feel most comfortable with those we perceive to be most like us.
Possibly related posts: (automatically generated)
Make persuasive communication happen for you
- Franchising: The alternative option
- The Right Message
- The Customized Business Plan
- Making the Plan: What's Realistic?
- Targeting Your Audience
- Transition From Power as You Grow Older
- Project Collaboration Monitoring, Control and Information
- Increasing your own Likeability, Harmonious and Productive Working Relationships
- Business Interviewing, Study your Talents Best
- A Colleague Seeks Advancement at Your Expense
Posted by: eric
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